Mark My Words: There Will Be A 'Star Wars' Babies Spin-Off

Joseph Heath
May 5
5 min read

Note: This article was originally written shortly after the second season finale of The Mandalorian.

In December, Lucasfilms announced a whole slew of Star Wars films and television series including a Rogue Squadron feature film, the Clone Wars spinoff The Bad Batch, and the Rogue One prequel series Andor.

But could there be a secret project in development? One whose origins began in 1978?

Then were further established in 2008?

With the last piece of the puzzle arriving in 2019?

After extensive research and combing through the clues, I have come to the only logical conclusion. I can declare with complete certainty that not only is there going to be a new Star Wars series, but I can tell you with pinpoint accuracy what the show will be about and which legendary characters it will feature.

Without further ado, I present to you the Star Wars spinoff that Lucasfilms doesn’t want you to know about but that I have totally figured out:

♫Star Wars Younglings, we make our dreams come true

Star Wars Younglings, we'll be a Jedi crew♫

In the season two finale of The Mandalorian, a surprise CGI Luke Skywalker arrived to take in Grogu (affectionately known by the fans as Baby Yoda or The Child). Clearly, Luke is gathering a group of force-sensitive children to be trained in the ways of the Jedi.

Grogu will lead this ragtag group of younglings.

I Like Adventure!

Fearless and inquisitive, Grogu is the first to jump into a new and exciting adventure. After forming an intense bond with his fellow younglings, he frequently uses his ever growing knowledge of the Force to save them from danger (after getting them all in trouble in the first place).

Some might be worried that removing Grogu from The Mandalorian will lead to a decreased interest in that show, but don’t you worry. His dad will pick him up during summer break.

I Like Space Food!

Introduced in The Clone Wars pilot movie, Rotta is the son of the infamous crime lord Jabba the Hutt. Since Rotta was a baby before Anakin became Darth Vader, you may be wondering how he will be in this show clearly set after Darth Vader’s demise. The answer is obvious when you know that Star Wars works on a poetic level. It rhymes. So if Jabba goes around freezing Han Solo...

After turning to a life of crime like his daddy, Rotta soon found himself one of the youngest creatures ever sentenced to carbon-freezing. Long thought to be lost, Luke Skywalker eventually stumbles upon his carbonite slab. He decides to defrost Rotta and lead him to the light side of the Force. Though Rotta tries to do what’s right, he’s still a little stinker!

Literally. His nickname is Stinky. It’s canon.

I Love Life Day!

In the 100% definitely canon Star Wars Holiday Special, we were introduced to Chewbacca’s son Lumpawarrump (or “Lumpy”). While this little Wookiee isn’t brave like his father, he still adequately fills the role of sidekick comic relief. Perhaps after being dragged into adventure after adventure, he’ll conquer his fears and change his name to reflect his new courageous attitude. Something real cool like... Lumpawaroo.

Yeah, that’s definitely it.

Ben Solo Brood!

Baby Ben Solo is the bad boy of the group. He’s always trying to pull pranks on his Uncle Luke. Watch out, though! When things don’t go his way, he throws the most terrible temper tantrums! But who could stay mad at that adorable face?

In much the same way that The Clone Wars filled in some of Anakin Skywalker’s backstory, this show will go a long way in fleshing out the origins of Kylo Ren. That inexplicable kiss at the end of The Rise of Skywalker is going to make so much sense after this show. Just you wait.

JUST.

YOU.

WAIT.

I am a Computer.

There’s not a baby version of R2-D2.

Droids don’t work like that.

Don’t be ridiculous.

I Speak Huttese and Bith.

C-3PO is also not a baby, but he has a new red arm! What’s that all about?!?

R2-D2 and C-3PO’s presence in the show will bring comfort and familiarity to those Star Wars fans who are incapable of handling change. Except for the change to C-3PO’s arm. SERIOUSLY, WHAT’S THE DEAL WITH THE RED ARM? I mean, I get the silver leg… but why the red arm??

There’s gotta be a story behind it, but it seems to be the only blind spot in my research.

Don’t tweet me.

I Play the Organ!

Maxine Rebo is the daughter of noted musician Max Rebo. AND SHE’S HERE TO PARTY. She can play any instrument and takes center stage for the contractually obligated musical number every episode!

Maxine will be voiced by Rachel Bloom who will also pull double duty in writing the songs. This is not just wishful thinking. This is all based on my solid scientific research. You cannot refute this.

And I am a Sith!

When watching The Rise of Skywalker, were you confused as to how Palpatine returned from the dead? Some of this will be vaguely alluded to when you meet Baby Sheev, a strand-cast clone of Darth Sidious who has infiltrated the group to sway Ben Solo to the Dark Side. Though he lacks a soul, he is filled to the brim with hate and anger. If he can not fulfill his mission, it is his duty to bring Ben’s life to a brutal end.

He’s also a bit of a weirdo!

Me, I Collect Things!

On the group’s many adventures, Bun-Sen Kanata can usually be found wherever there are priceless artifacts or immeasurable treasures. She’s definitely inherited her mom’s legacy of piracy. Not only does she collect trinkets, but she can use them to construct various explosive devices and incredibly dangerous weapons to assist the team.

Extrapolating from comments made by Maz Kanata in The Force Awakens, it will be revealed that Bun-Sen is actually Lumpy’s half-sister. But only after she’s developed a crush on the Wookiee! When she confesses this to Master Luke, he gets weirdly quiet.

Mesa Mesa!

This is a no-brainer. Baby Jar Jar has to be in the show. It’s the most logical thing out of all the logical things proposed in this article. Jar Jar Binks is a highly popular character. He moves merchandise. He is the focus of this iconic scene. A baby version of him? The public’s gonna go nuts. Just think of all the memes! Goodbye, Minions! Hello, Baby Jar Jar!

And not only will it be fun and wonderful to see a baby version of this delightful character, but it’ll be narratively satisfying as well. Finally, we will have the canonical proof that Jar Jar Binks does in fact… FUCK.

Is everything all right in here? Yes, Master.

Training the younglings is Luke Skywalker, played by promising newcomer Mark Hamill who you might know as the voice of the Joker. Luke struggles to maintain the balance of the Force AND the balance of work and kids. Will he be able to handle the stress of raising these younglings and constantly saving the galaxy?

Nope. He becomes a grumpy old hermit.

♫Star Wars Younglings, we make our dreams come true

Star Wars Younglings, we'll be a Jedi crew♫